Do You Understand The True Meaning of Love?
What exactly is “love”? For such a small word, it has a deep connection with almost everything on the planet. You can fall in love with someone, do something in their honor, and even love to hate something. It’s not only a very versatile word, but also a very versatile concept! But what exactly is love? And why is everyone so upset about it?
Science explains it in an unromantic way: we feel love when certain hormones are released throughout our bodies and certain regions of the brain, such as the hippocampus, are activated. Isn’t it boring? Thankfully, since the dawn of time, hopeless romantics, philosophers, bards, poets, musicians, and others have studied, philosophized, pondered, and dwelled on love.
The end result? At the very least, we now understand that there are numerous types of love! In fact, ancient Greek philosophers studied the subject and discovered six different types of love.\
The Highest Form of Love is Agape
Agápe is thought to be the highest form of love. It can, however, be interpreted in a number of different ways. The word was first used as a verb during the time of Homer, the legendary Greek author who wrote the Iliad and the Odyssey around the 7th century BC.
At the time, the meaning of agápe was closer to affection, as in greeting someone with affection. However, the word evolved over time and is now much more closely associated with divine love as a result of its use in various Bible translations. In such cases, agápe refers to both God’s love for mankind and mankind’s love for God.
Éros is The Romantic Lover
Éros is such a revered and significant form of love that it inspired the name of the Greek god of love.
Following suit, the word for “intimate love” in Modern Greek is “Erotas,” and this is not a typo — Éros is the closest thing to what we would call romantic love today. This type of love usually consists of thoughts, desires, and actions that are restricted to the bedroom or dating. But it goes beyond that.
It is also the type of love found in marriage, the kind of love one has for their other half. In fact, Plato thought it was more of the former than the latter, because he saw it as having no physical bounds or attraction and thus being platonic.
Philia, Brotherly Love or Friendship Love
Philia, or love shared between friends, is one of the most common types of love that we encounter on a daily basis. Aristotle, the Greek philosopher, first defined this type of love as love shared between friends, specifically in three types of friendships. The first kind of friendship is based on utility, or usefulness.
This type of philia is characterized by relationships or interactions between people in very limited circumstances, such as purchasing something from someone. In modern times, we would probably refer to this type of relationship as an acquaintance rather than a friendship. The second type of philia is much more in line with our expectations; it is entirely concerned with enjoying the company of others.
This could be having a drink together, sharing experiences through a shared hobby, or simply doing something enjoyable with another person. The ultimate form of philia, referred to as the highest form, is the love shared between brothers and true friends.
It’s the kind of philia where you enjoy each other’s company as well as their personalities. It’s when you genuinely like the other person, rather than just because they’re entertaining to be around.
Storge — The love Shared among Family Members
Storge is a type of love that is said to be the most natural, developing more as an instinct than anything else. It’s the kind of love a mother feels for her child even before they’re born, and it’s what keeps families together no matter what the world throws at them.
This type of love is almost exclusively felt between family members and can grow or shrink over time depending on how close they keep company.
One major interpretation of storge that is not related to family but can be found among close friends. The love grows closer to philia as the friendship grows. However, as friends grow closer and begin to care for each other almost instinctively, it can develop into stoic love, where your friends feel like family.
Philautia is The Love of Oneself
Philautia was originally associated with self-love and taking care of one’s own happiness or well-being. Surprisingly, this wasn’t always regarded as a highly valued form of love; in fact, it was regarded as a moral flaw! Those who practiced philautia were labeled as vain, selfish, and egotistical.
However, philautia has gained a better reputation and understanding over time. Philautia, or self-love, gradually emerged as a concept that is not only good, but also extremely beneficial to your mental health. A psychologist first made the connection between self-love and mental health in 1830, but it didn’t take off until the twentieth century.
Nowadays, self-love is regarded as crucial, and it is common practice to take a day off just to look after yourself! When was the last time you celebrated yourself?
Xenia — Hospitality as a Source of Love
This type of love is more of a general guideline to follow in order to be hospitable to all who pass by your home. It is the love that stems from hospitality, and it is one of the world’s oldest and most deeply rooted forms.
When it comes to the concept of Xenia, cultures from all over the world share similarities. The shared characteristics are generally along the same lines, but they all stem from one central principle: you must honor all who cross your threshold, as well as feed and shelter them.
An example of this can be found in the many myths and legends from pre-Christian religions across Europe.
In such myths, a deity walks the earth in the form of a human and visits various homes to test their hospitality. The common theme is that if the guest is treated with honor, the deity rewards or gifts them, and if they are not, they are punished.
Talk about adversity!
What we’ve discussed today is just a drop in the ocean of ways we’ve discovered to describe the feelings, thoughts, and emotions that we define as love. Love appears to be intangible, difficult to grasp, and as such, we will likely continue to try to define it for the rest of time.
So, what exactly is it? “Love is all you need,” according to John Lennon and Paul McCartney, is the best way to describe it.
